Wives are young men’s mistresses, companions for middle age, and old men’s nurses.

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life

“Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.”

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed.

All that a husband or wife really wants is to be pitied a little, praised a little, and appreciated a little.

Last night I had an argument with my wife – she asked me what was on the TV and i said ‘dust’.

American women expect to find in their husbands a perfection that English women only hope to find in their butlers.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

A wife, a lover, can perhaps never see what the artist sees They rarely ever do. Perhaps a really mediocre artist has more chance of success.

Don’t marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without, but whatever you do, you’ll regret it later.

It was a wife’s duty to be interested in whatever interested her husband, whether it was politics, books, or a particular dish for dinner.

“The last word” is the most dangerous of infernal machines; and husband and wife should no more fight to get it than they would struggle for the possession of a lighted bomb-shell.