The lengths to which you’re prepared to go to please a housekeeper make me wonder about the servant situation in Scotland. Good help must be thin on the ground.” Vale widened his eyes and took a drink.“She’s more to me than a housekeeper,” Alistair growled.“Wonderful!” Vale slapped him on the back. “And about time, too. I was beginning to worry that all your important bits might’ve atrophied and fallen off from disuse.”He felt unaccustomed heat climb his throat. “Vale…
Orlando had a Pinto, a car that hadn't been in existence for thirty-plus years. He still hadn't figured out why a strong, strapping werewolf would want one. Orlando said it was because he'd customized it. Painted pink with purple stripes, the younger male could often be found cruising up and down the streets of Wolf Town, with his terrible music blaring out of the windows. The car was a ticking time bomb. Already, more than one werewolf had offered to blow it up. Orlando better enjoy it, Connor doubted he would have it for very much longer.
This isn't the first time I've used this, and the test subject showed no signs of impaired cognitive ability.""Who was the test subject?" asked Aurora."I test everything out on myself before taking it into the field."She stared at him. "You zapped your own brain?""And it didn't do me any harm apart from the dizziness and the vomiting spells and the weirdly persistent ringing in my ears. Also the blackouts and the mood swings and the creeping paranoia. Apart from that, zero side effects, if you don't count the numb fingertips. Which I don't.
He openned the door that he assumed was the garage only to find himself in the pantry.crap."Um . . . grabbing some Pop-Tarts for the road," Nick said, covering his mistake. Still, they both stared at him as if he'd escaped Arkham Asylum. Offering them a fake smile, he grabbed the pastries, crossed himself, and hoped he got the next door correct.Nope. Bathroom.With a pain-filled groan at his rampant stupidity, Nick pretended to use it before he tried again. At least there were only two more doors to go.Fifty-fifty chance.Thankfully, third time was the charm.
Has anyone ever told you that you're unbearably rude?" she returned, facing him again."Why, yes. You have on several occasions, as I recall. If you care to apologize for that, however, I'll be happy to escort you wherever you wish to go."A flush crept up her cheeks, coloring her delicate, ivory skin. "I will never apologize to you," she snapped. "And you may go straight to Hades."He hadn't expected her to apologize, yet he couldn't help suggesting it every so often. "Very well. Upstairs, first door on the left. I'll be in Hades, if you should require my services.
Nat is already laughing. We go through this every morning. She tells Nik I own a clown car.I glower at her while I put my foot up onto Nik’s lap and kick the passenger door while turning the ignition.She starts.Works every time.Nik looks like he’s not sure whether to laugh or get the hell out of the car.We’re on our way to work and Nat says, “Nik, turn on the radio.”He shakes his head and replies cynically, “I would but I’m scared the roof might fly off.”Nat and I burst into laughter. We laugh so much we both sob and laugh at the same time.
From the Diary of the Duchess of RoxburgheI vow, I cannot seem to walk past a window without seeing my great-nephew carrying Miss Balfour somewhere. All great romantic poems have such scenes where the hero, in a fit of passion, sweeps the heroine off her feet. Sadly, it appears that Sin’s technique is questionable.I’m surprised that, with all of his supposed experience with the gentler sex, he doesn’t realize that women do not like to be carried in a way that musses their hair and leaves them with unattractively red faces. Sadly, yet another conversation I shall have to have with that boy.
A mistake? The most passionate night of his life was a mistake? Her first time and that’s what she thought. That grated on him in the worst way. “Is that what you think, Beth?”“Don’t call me that.”“Why, Beth?”“You know I hate that name.”“Oh, so sorry, Beth. I do apologize, Beth.” He was being petty and he knew it, but he didn’t give a damn. She’d always brought out the very worst in him.She reached up and twisted his ear. “Ow!”“Out of my way, Robert Lemonade,” she said casually, pissing him off in the worst way.
Shocked?” Juliet queried, the light pink tint on her cheeks the only telling sign of her discomfort with the conversation.He nodded. “Yes. I had no idea my little girl knew what fluffies were.”Juliet opened her mouth to respond but was cut off by more misguided innocence from Kate. “They’re the fluffy things Juliet keeps hidden in her dress here and here,” she said proudly, tapping her chest to indicate just where these fluffy objects were located.Patrick blinked. “That’s quite enough, Katie love. Why don’t you go paint some flowers or something. I need to have a word alone with Juliet.
Pamela pulled off her cloak and Alexei gasped."You have on breeches!" He stared in disbelief. "Breeches!""I've never worn them before, and they are extremely comfortable. I quite like them." She smoothed the fabric over her hip. "Besides, you don't expect me to duel in a dress, do you?""I do not expect you to duel at all!"Pamela ignored him. "That would be most unfair, dueling in a dress, unless, of course, you would be willing to wear a dress as well?""Don't be absurd." He snorted in disdain. "I have no intention of ever wearing women's clothing again.""Again?" She raised a brow."It was an unavoidable disguise," he muttered.
NOTHING HAS EVER LOOKED LIKE THAT EVER IN ALL OF HUMAN HISTORY,” he said. His enthusiasm was adorable. I couldn’t resist leaning over to kiss him on the cheek.“Just so you know, I’m right here,” Mom said. “Sitting next to you. Your mother. Who held your hand as you took your first infantile steps.”“It’s friendly,” I reminded her, turning to kiss her on the cheek.“Didn’t feel too friendly,” Gus mumbled just loud enough for me to hear. When surprised and excited and innocent Gus emerged from Grand Gesture Metaphorically Inclined Augustus, I literally could not resist.
She winced and covered her ears as Eric,onstage, wrestled with his microphone."Sorry about that, guys!" he yelled. "All right. I'm Eric, and this is my homeboy Matt on the drums. My first poem is called 'Untitled.'" He screwed up his face as if in pain, and wailed into the mike. "Come my faux juggernaut, my nefarious loins! Slather every protuberance with arid zeal!"Simon slid down in his seat. "Please don't tell anyone I know him."Clary giggled. "Who uses the word 'loins'?""Eric," Simon said grimly. "All his poems have loins in them."'Turgid is my torment!" Eric wailed. "Agony swells within!""You bet it does," Clary said.
No, you don’t get to touch yourself in my car.”“Why not?” It wasn’t a whine, it wasn’t. My voice was too deep to whine. It was more of a… whoan. Or something. I couldn’t think.“Three reasons. One, I don’t want to get into an accident trying to keep my eyes on you. Two, if I got into an accident, or if we were pulled over for indecent exposure, the mood killing would be the least of our problems. Three,” and here it was, the tone I loved, that I could barely wait for even though I knew I wasn’t going to like what he had to say, “for the rest of the night, that’s mine. Don’t touch it.
Oh, poor baby,” she said, mimicking his drawl.“Whew. You’re back. There was this other Susie here a minute ago, and she was really nice to me. She scared the shit out of me.”She laughed. “They locked her back up in the loony bin.”“Good, because there’s only one Susie for me—the one who calls me on my crap and doesn’t let me get away with jack shit. That’s the Susie I need. That’s the Susie I’ve missed coming home to over the last year.” He kissed her. “And that’s the Susie who’s going to leave a gaping hole in my heart and my life if she doesn’t give me another chance.
No more tubs for me." I jumped off the bed and pulled on a pair of Pack sweats. "They make me lose all sense."Curran sprawled on the bed with a big self-satisfied smile. "Want to know a secret?""Sure.""It's not the bathtub, baby."Well, aren't we smug. I picked up the corner of the lowest mattress and made a show of looking under it."What are you looking for?""A pea Your Majesty.""What?""You heard me."I jumped back as he lunged and his fingers missed me by an inch."Getting slow in your old age.""I thought you liked it slow."A flashback to last night mugged me and my mind executed a full stop.He laughed. "Ran out of snappy comebacks?""Hush. I'm trying to think of one.
