Of course I don't care if you're bleeding! I'm fucking autistic!

No one plays Bass guitar. everyones like "Oh yeah I play guitar" strum strum

Emma was doing something nice for Simon? Hell must be enjoying the snow day.

Humanity is a parade of fools, and I am at the front of it, twirling a baton.

A word to the wise an't nesisary its the stupid ones who need the edvise.

I'm rarely rude except accidentally, and that doesn't really count...

You can't do much for the poor, as they are not in with the right people.

Shut up, you fool...Really. I’m running out of things to throw at you.

The thing I hate about an argument is that it always interrupts a discussion.

If one door closes and another door opens, chances are your house is haunted.

In a way it was worth it, she thought, except that it was such a total waste.

You can't beat me. I have the mind of a warlock with adonis DNA. Winning!

You held me down and rammed me so hard I deep-throated you from the other end.

You got off on the wrong foot. I merely watched you shove it into your mouth.

He says in his defence he never meddled with married women, only with virgins.