I drink wine because I don t like to keep things bottled up

Alcohol solves all our life s problems only when we re drunk

Rather be someone s shot of whisky than everyone s cup of tea

Recession: When Wine and Women get replaced by Water and Wife

People who drink to escape their problems are Booze-dils

Food security bill passed Now we have to earn only for liquo

I distrust camels anyone else who can go a week without a drink

Whisky mixes really well with almost everything except decisions

Two beer or not two beer that is the question William Shakesbee

You know you re drunk when you get out of bed and miss the floo

I drank so much vodka last night I woke up with a Russian accent

What device tells you that you ve drunk too much? A karaoke machine

Alcohol is never the answer unless the question is - What is C2H5OH?

It s a lot easier to start the day when you know it will end with BEER

Alcohol - A liquid good for preserving almost everything except secrets