Twas Thomas Edison did declareThat waste is worse than lossYet never once saw fit to pareHis first name to Tomás

Morning, Bill,' said Lord Tidmouth agreeably.'Go to hell!' said Bill.'Right-ho,' said his lordship.

The photoshopping of female models is sending precisely the right message to young girls: Learn image editing software!

To see a man slip on a banana skin is to see a rationally structured system suddenly translated into a whirling machine.

Unhealthy behavior is actually common among doctors, who tend to know a lot about medicine but very little about health.

A Wasn’t just isn't. He just isn't present. But you… You ARE YOU! And, now isn't that pleasant!

The FDA has announced that women deserve the same sexual rights as men. Insert ironic comment into any willing orifice.

It seems to me that they only seem to mention things in the Bible that are within a 5 mile radius of the guy writing it.

Secret 7591037. Anything they can do to you, they can do for you; and anything they can do for you, they can do to you.

Wait, you said ‘carry-on’ items? Not ‘carrion’ items? In that case, no, I don’t have any.

And For You Zero, A Life Sized Vudu Doll"-Kaname Kuran"I DONT WANT IT!"-Zero Kiryu"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"-Juri Elizabeth Marin

Duct tape can't fix stupid," Bas growled. "Maybe not," Red replied, "but it can hold it down and muffled the screams.

Comedy isn t polite and it isn t correct and it isn t accurate even It s just a mess So that s the way that I approach it

The trouble with facial recognition software is that you get mistaken for every other person who doesn't have a face.

In certain circumstances, basically shit ones, it’s fight or flight. With Tommy it’s always fright and flight.