Nice place," I said while prudently hovering near the only exit.Beyond Varallan

Papa, potatoes, poultry, prunes and prism, are all very good words for the lips.

Life is way too short, so try to enjoy every minute of it with a sense of humor!

I have been told the best things in life are free ~ I found them very expensive.

Behind every humorist who delights in knifing hypocrites is a major self-critic.

Be careful what you wear to bed, because you never know where you might wake up.

His mama beat him with an ugly stick so hard, it gone straight on till his soul.

I normally don't do requests. Unless, of course, I have been asked to do so.

I bet that dog-walking trollop called the cops on us. - Esme from Sister Mischief

Put down that bottle and pickup an Oreo instead...you"ll live longer! #JustSaying

If you absolutely had to have sex with one of the Three Stooges, who would it be?

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.

Follow Your Dreams, Except the One Where You’re at School in Your Underwea

I cannot see you anymore. Your ego spans higher than the Himalayas.” Sutara

Never do anything that you don’t want to have to explain to 9-1-1 personnel.