Knowledge may be power, but half of what I know I wish I could forget.

Love is a gift. Mine comes in a box that’s shaped like a coffin.

When I get to Heaven I just know I'm going to forget my toothbrush.

Damn there were days being a woman confused the hell out of her.- Aella

Sorry. Sometimes my mouth engages before making contact with my brain.

Evolution is a theory with more holes than a Dutch dam of swiss cheese.

Just tell him to keep his hands to himself and his python in his pants.

Everything is uncomfortable for the first time: School, Smoking or Sex.

For Breakfast I like my coffee warm and cozy and my eggs funny side up.

We all have different languages; but we all really mean the same thing.

what's the saying? All is donkey balls in love and war?-Dan Garrett

If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t either.

Love may be on the horizon, but beware something wicked this way comes.

wear flannel next to your skin, and never believe in eternal punishment.

What's the point of using words nobody knows or can say comfortably?