To neglect ones own ability to laugh is the greatest form of Blasphemy, for to laugh is to pray.

Sam: I've never considered myself a finicky eater. No pie ever crossed my path and survived.

Wear your CIA badge like it's an electric guitar and you're a member of the Sex Pistols.

The medium is the message, the message is encrypted, and the encryption key is controlled by NSA.

My operational cover won’t withstand scrutiny. It starts blushing and giggling every time.

You can’t keep bitch-slapping your creativity, or it’ll run away and find a new pimp.

Why is the poem called 'The Road Not Taken,' when it's about the road that was taken?

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks!”-Totie Fields-

Mishaque was a stouty blend of Irish "shrek" mixed with crazy Jafakain, his front was car dealing.

A typical breakfast for a CIA ops officer consists of a pastry and a piping hot cup of Armageddon.

The height of your position on it notwithstanding, the fact is you’re still living on a hog.

If you see the light at the end of the tunnel, you’re lookingthrough binoculars the wrongway

You can never talk religion on network TV. It makes too many people angry. You can talk about sex.

Even if I did create them myself, I still think I'm doing pretty well under the circumstances.

I think comedy as an art involves the audience as a participant as much as is involves the artist.