Once you've played a real video game about war, you don't understand how people can play video games about video games about war.

The main bridge of the original Starship Enterprise had pictures of galaxies above each workstation. Probably in case the ship got lost.

Intelligence Forecast of the Week: Quantum physicists will discover that the hokey pokey is actually more than what it’s all about.

During my first tour, the COS told me "Your contact reporting needs more glandularity." I said "You mean granularity?" He said "That too.

Secret 1.4. The real question isn't whether you're cleared for top secret, it's whether you're cleared for unclassified.

But she's a redhead, so she's probably evil, even at her tender age.""I thought you liked redheads.""I do. What's your point?

When you keep a secret from your parents, you're not trying to protect yourself. It's because you're trying to protect them.

There is a moment of sheer panic when I realize that Paul's apartment overlooks the park... and is obviously more expensive than mine.

...big, strapping macho guys were like liquid diets--they were great for emergencies, but she wouldn't want to be on one all the time.

Dolphins and sharks are natural enemies. Dolphins are like, "Quit eating us," and sharks are like, "Stop smiling all the time, you morons.

The map may not be the territory, but if the theory of a 2-dimensional holographic universe is confirmed, it means the territory is a map.

Don’t tell people “Tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today” today. Prepare today and then tell them tomorrow.

John Adams warned of the division of America into two great political parties. Luckily, the parties we ended up with are mediocre at best.

The Amish purposely wear drab clothing to discourage lust. If they want to prevent lust, why don't Amish people just walk around naked?

Some parts of the Bible I find a little troubling. For example, if Jesus really believed in nonviolence, why did He destroy the Death Star?