But a cock does not enter a hen… it enters a…meow-meow!

No one believes you’re serious until bodies start to fall. -Vlad

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination

Don't leave it all unsaid,somewhere in the wasteland of your head.

I don't mind foreigners. God save the queen!" he squeaked and ran.

I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.

Most men are not wicked... They are sleep-walkers, not evil evildoers.

Basically, I have two speeds.... Hostile or smart-aleck. Your choice.

It was like being leaned on by a very heavy, warm brick. A sexy brick.

It is a damn poor mind that can think of only one way to spell a word.

Nerds like us are allowed to be unironically enthusiastic about stuff.

You can print a book, unfortunately you can’t print the audience

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.

I feel ill," [Howl] announced. "I'm going to bed, where I may die.