Facebook is a popularity contest…and I’m losing.

Flirting is the art of making a man feel pleased with himself.

I don’t know what makes you so dumb but it really works.

You don’t have to like me, I’m not a Facebook status.

God loves me even when I don’t forward those chain letters.

You don’t have to like me. I’m not a Facebook status.

GirlfriEND, boyfriEND, friEND, everything has an END except for famILY.

The real trouble with reality is that there’s no background music.

Facebook is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall.

We always ignore the ones who adore us, and adore the ones who ignore us.

Facebook is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall.

You know you had fun when you can’t tell your parents what you did.

Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my dealer and my alarm clock is the police.

Some people need to realize that Facebook is a social network, not a diary.

My lips are chapped, I think they’re dying without the touch of yours!