Santa saw a beautiful gal he went and smooched her Gal - What are you doing? Santa: Law 4th semester from Punjab University

Bar owner: You can t stand here You re blocking the fire exit Santa: Don t worry If there s a fire I won t be standing here

Santa was working for the 1st time in a garment shop Girl: Show me an underwear please Santa: Well I haven t worn it today

Banta: I thought you said this camp had no mosquitoes? Santa: That s right These mosquitoes come from the camp down the road

Santa (reading from book of facts): Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies? Banta: Why don t you use a mouth wash?

Barber: Will you have anything on your face when I ve finished? Banta: I don t know but I hope you ll at least leave my nose

Santa to his boss: I m sorry I just assumed that if you wanted this project done quickly you wouldn t have assigned it to me

Santa: Some people tell me to be myself Banta: Yeah it s good for self-esteem Santa: But I always get in trouble when I do

Jeeto: Before we were married you said mother could stay with us whenever she pleased Santa: Yes but she hasn t pleased yet

Santa: Banta once told me 0nions are the only food that make you cry That was before I hit him in the face with a Watermelon

Jeeto teaching English grammar to her hubby Jeeto: `I am beautiful` which tense is that? Santa: It certainly is a past tense

Banta: A man s speech has been restored by the kick of a mule Santa: A divorce is less painful and one gets the same results

Jeeto: If I die what ll you do? Santa: I may also die Jeeto: Why? Santa: Some time too much of happiness can also kill a man

What a rip-off Santa picked up a book called 37 Mating Positions He goes home opens it and it turns out to be a book on chess

Banta: What s marriage? Santa: Marriage is the 7th sense of human that destroys all the 6 senses and makes the person nonsense