Santa s romantic Valentine s Day poem for his wife Jeeto: Roses are Laal Violets are Neele; You ve made the Daal now wash the Pateele

An Englishman asked Santa How far is land? Santa: 2 KM Englishman jumped into sea Englishman: Now which direction? Santa: Downwards

Santa calls up White house Santa: I want to be the next president of USA Obama: Are you an idiot? Santa: Why? Is it a qualification?

Banta was driving down the highway past a sign that said Clean Toilets 8 Kms By the time he drove eight kms he had cleaned 14 toilets

Drunken Santa points towards sky and asks drunken Banta; Is it sun or moon? Banta: I can t say what it is because I am new to the town

Banta: It is sickening way my wife keeps talking about her Ex-Husband Santa: That s nothing Mine keeps talking about her next husband

A police officer came up to Santa to enquire about a recent crime Policeman: Where were you between four and six? Santa: Kindergarten

Santa to his doctor My wife has lost her voice How can I help her get it back? Doctor: Try coming home at three o clock in the morning

Santa: I am fed up of my life Banta: Now what happened? Santa: Everytime I m about to win an argument with my wife someone wakes me up

Banta: Did you feel the vibrations of the earthquake? Santa: Married men neither feel and nor are affected by vibrations or earthquakes

Santa: My wife can t stop eating chips Banta: What s wrong with it? Santa: You don t understand It makes her a liability at the casino

Santa: Just fancy my wife even takes my shoes off with her own hands Banta: When you come in at night? Santa: No when I want to go out

Santa: I got married because I was tired of cooking cleaning home and washing clothes Banta: Amazing I got divorce for the same reason

Santa: If I die will u remarry? Jeeto: No I ll stay with my sister But if I die will u remarry? Santa: No I ll also stay with ur siste

Banta: How do you feel when women gives you a flying kiss ? Santa: I like the feelings expressed by the woman but I hate such lazy women