Shopkeeper: This sweater s made of pure virgin wool sir Santa: You see I am not interested in the morals of the sheep Just tell me will it keep me warm?

A man to Santa: Ur friend is kissing ur wife in ur home Santa rushes home and came back within half an hour n slapped the man n said: He s not my friend

Banta: As soon as women see me they want to get in shape to impress me Santa: That s really impressive Exactly what do they do? Banta: They start running

Santa becomes driver of a train The 1st train driven by him was 8 hours late b`coz he stopped at every halt and asked Is this the right track to Amritsar?

While walking in the highlands Santa fell down a deep hole Banta: Are U OK? Santa: Yeah Banta: Did u break anything? Santa: No there s nothing down here

Shaadi Mein Santa bahut der se khana kha raha tha kisi ne pucha kab tak khaoge? Santa: Main toh khud pareshan hoon par card me likha hai Dinner 7-12 PM

Santa Banta got tired of mobile decide 2 use pigeons 1day a pigeon reaches Banta without message Angry Banta calls Santa Santa: Oye this was a missed call

Santa: For husbands keeping wives happy is a job of our LEFT HAND Banta: So why don t men do it? Santa: Unfortunately 95% of men are actually RIGHT HANDED

Santa: Oxygen is must for breathing: It was discovered in 1773 Banta: Thank God I was born after that If I was born before that I would have died too soon

Judge: Why were u arrested? Santa: For shopping early Judge: Well that’s not a crime Anyway how early were u shopping? Santa: Before the shop opened

Santa: Meet my wife Jeeto Banta: Oh I know her Santa: How? Banta: We were caught sleeping together Santa: What the hell? Banta: During a History lecture

Jeeto: If I fire the cook and make the food myself for a month what will you pay me? Santa: I don t have to pay you you will get my entire insurance amount

Nurse came out with the newborn kid Santa rushed 2 her after seeing the kid he shouted PUTTAR hua PUTTAR She slapped him: Leave my finger u fool It s a gal

Banta: When I get mad at u u never fight back How do u control ur anger? Preeto: I clean the toilet Banta: How does that help? Preeto: I use ur toothbrush

Santa: I and Banta were stuck on an escalator for almost 2 hours due to power failure Friend: You could have walked down Santa: Actually we were going up