Borders are irrelevant Except when they are on a Kanjeevaram saree

Forgiveness is cheaper than a lawsuit but not nearly as gratifying

Men who only think of having ball will turn up at a wrong ball game

Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber not the toy

A girl in a swimsuit wears nothing to speak of but plenty to talk about

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired

Up until recently I was dating a girl with a wooden leg but I broke it off

If moths are attracted to bright lights how come they sleep during the day?

Feminists If you hate men so much why are you always trying to be like them?

Men are like fast food they never look as good in real life as they do on TV

The law of heredity is that all undesirable traits come from the other parent

When I m finally holding all the cards why does everyone decide to play chess?

Girlfriends are like credit cards you can t get one unless you already have one

Alcoholism is the only disease that tries to convince you that you don t have it

If we find life on other planets what would happen to the Miss Universe pageant?