Tip to reduce weight, first turn your head to the left and then turn it to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.

Teacher: Who can explain gender discrimination with an example? Student: Women can sleep with whoever they want ,men have to sleep with whoever lets them!

Thinks if Peter Piper picked peppers and Jack and Jill ran up the hill and Mary took her lamb to school, wasn’t Humpty Dumpty lazy just sitting on a wall?

Doctors finally figured out whats wrong with a boys brain; on the left side, there’s nothing right; and on the right side, there’s nothing left…

I have finally figured out why I can’t lose this extra weight. The shampoo I use in the shower that runs down my body says, “for extra volume and body.”

I know that somewhere in the Universe exists my perfect soulmate … but looking for her is much more difficult than just staying at home and ordering another pizza.

Sorry, I can’t hangout. My uncle’s cousin’s sister in law’s best friend’s insurance agent’s roommate’s pet goldfish died. Maybe next time..

FACEBOOK STORY: Add as friend – Approve -> Write something on wall -Intro – Everyday chatting – Ask number phone – Messaging – Calling – Meeting – Express love – Make relationship status – Hangout – Misunderstanding – Fight – Break up – Unfriend – Block THE END