I don’t have a bad handwriting, I have my own font.
I don’t have a bad handwriting, I have my own font.
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
I wish my money would have sex in my wallet and multiply.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
Promises are like babies. Fun to make but hell to deliver.
I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.
I used to be schizophrenic, but we’re all right now.
When I want your opinion, I’ll remove the duct tape.
You annoy me. Go swimming.. with a brick tied to your foot.
Some people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.
I didn’t fall, the floor looked like it needed a hug.
I’m naked under these clothes. I’m such a slut.
We live in a time period of smart phones and stupid people.