A free lunch is only found in mousetraps

Good Morning is a contradiction in terms

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand

Why isn t there mouse-flavored cat food?

Chocolate helps everything except obesity

What garlic is to food insanity is to art

Chemically speaking alcohol is a solution

Practice safe eating-always use condiments

There is always free cheese in a mousetrap

Beer: It s not just for breakfast any more

Practice safe eating always use condiments

The Christmas spirit is not what you drink

I say no to alcohol it just doesn t listen

Avoid fruits and nuts-you are what you eat

Soft drink laws always fizzle and fall flat