A woman was playing golf when she took a big swing and fell The party waiting behind her was a group of politicians A Congress man quickly stepped forward and helped her to her feet She thanked him and started to leave when he said I m the local MP and I hope you ll vote for me in the next General Elections She laughed and quickly said I fell on my ass not my head
After setting sail on a solo voyage around the world Peter Goss 35 said an inflamed tendon in his arm began causing problems Three months into the voyage he operated on himself to repair the tendon using a flashlight strapped to his head for illumination and following faxed instructions from a French doctor It`s a strange sensation slicing away at yourself with a scalp
Pakistan announced a ban on lavish wedding feasts Explaining such celebrations cause financial hardships for the poor and middle classes lawmakers voted in May to restrict families to a wedding meal at home for relatives and house guests Larger gatherings can take place at hotels and clubs outside the home but no food may be served -- only hot and cold non-alcoholic drinks
Q: What clothes does the politicians love to wear? A: Poll-yester clothes Q: Which dance do politicians love? A: The Poll dance Q: What s the politician s favourite sport? A: Poll vault Q: Where do Politicians send their kids? A: To Poll-y technique colleges Q: What s the politician s favourite game? A; Poll-O Q: What s the politician s best loved virtue? A: Poll-iteness
Norias Texas - Six men believed to be illegal aliens from Mexico were killed by a freight train while sleeping on the tracks The train crew saw some debris on the tracks said Letty Garza a spokeswoman for the Border Patrol That next split-second they saw heads raise up and then six people were killed instantly Illegal aliens and transients sleep on the tracks because they think snakes won`t get them there
A custody battle in Santa Ana CA took an unusual turn when the mother of a 3-year-old girl claimed the girl`s father is actually a woman Kristie Vecchione 27 said her husband became a man through sex-change operations more than 20 years ago Vecchione who was impregnated by artificial insemination wants sole custody of her daughter on claims that same-sex marraiges are not recognized in the state of California
An angry senator was attacking a minister of government The minister tried to interrupt the senator s speech I haven t finished yet roared the senator and went on in his near- defamatory tirade Each time the minister tried to protest the Senator yelled I haven t finished yet At long last when the speech ended the minister asked Have you finished now? Yes replied the senator taking his seat Then pull the chain
Singe Soren the Woman Sarpanch(Village head) of Badapalasa was unseated because she gave birth to her third child According to the Law which came into effect on December 31 1995; it amounts to disqualification of Municipal Councilors and Panchayat members who produce a third child and it just took the petition in Mayurbhanj district court to remove Singe from her Sarpanch seat Progeny sometimes spoils the political careers
Vienna : An Austrian man narrowly escaped death when he fell onto an open dishwasher and was speared by a knife Kronen Zeitung newspaper reported The 35 year old Tyrolean slipped on the tiled floor of a friend’s kitchen and fell backwards onto the machine’s cutlery basket A 12-cm (five inch) kitchen knife drove itself into the man’s back narrowly missing vital organs He suffered serious injuries but his life is not in dange
Baltimore Maryland - A 15-year-old girl was briefly suspended from school for casting a spell on a fellow student Jamie Schoonover acknowledges she practices witchcraft as does her mother but both say Jamie would never cast an evil spell on anyone even if she knew how Casting a spell isn`t something that just any novice is going to know how to do said Colleen Harper a transexual who was Jamie`s biological father and now calls herself her mothe
A member of the Parliament known for his hot temper and acid tongue exploded one day in mid-session and began to shout Half of this House is made up of cowards and corrupt politicians All the other members demanded that the angry member withdraw his statement or be removed from the remainder of the session After a long pause the angry member acquiesced Okay he said I withdraw what I said Half of this Housee is not made up of cowards and corrupt politicians
A dead woman gained enough votes to advance to a runoff for the Democratic nomination for the U S Senate leaving political experts puzzled and her party wondering what to do if she wins Jacquelyn Morrow Lewis Ledgerwood died of a heart attack at age 69 on July 15 too close to the election to have her name taken off the ballot She received 21 percent of the vote Tuesday in a field of four finishing second behind an air conditioner contractor who got 46 percent
GARY Indiana - Last Monday FBI agents busted a 1 000-a-day cocaine ring being run out of City Hall allegedly by the city`s chief computer programer and its payroll clerk Programer Arthur Harris 46 and clerk Karen Laverne Shivers 41 were arrested at their apartment Monday Agents seized 5 ounces of cocaine 6 ounces of crack and 6 000 Federal agents said they taped three telephone conversations in which Harris speaking on a City Hall phone arranged to sell crack
A 31-year-old Vietnamese woman Phan Thi Hien forced her 10-year-old stepson to stitch up his moutha as punishment for stealing 200 dong (1 3 cents) The boy was beaten severly and given a needle and thread by his stepmother and was forced to sew his lips together while she stood watch over him Newpaper reports state that Hien could be prosecuted on charge of ill-treating the child Incedentally she has not been arrested since she has a younger child to take care of
About four years ago David Weinlick 28 Minneapolis got tired of people asking him when he was going to get married so he started to answer June 13 1998 It became part of his shtick Only one thing is missing from his upcoming wedding: a bride Potential brides are invited to attend Weinlick`s bridal candidate mixer the day of the ceremony where the grrom`s friends will screen them and their friends will screen Weinlick There will be a vote and Weinlick will marry the winne
