Homeless sign: I bet you can t hit me with a quarte

If you live among the wolves learn to howl like them

Waterloo: This is where Napoleon tore his bone apart

Keep the police on their toes steal their squad cars

I d like to help the homeless but they re never home

If at first you do succeed try not to look astonished

Man is a social animal who dislikes his fellow beings

A lottery is just a tax on people who are bad at math

When it comes to hiding porn every man is a CIA agent

I wish Google Maps had an Avoid Ghetto routing option

I went to the Missing Persons Bureau No one was there

Don t worry about old age - it doesn t last that long

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

If a deaf person goes to court is it still a hearing?

People like you are the reason we have middle fingers