Santa comes home with his little daughter whom he has just taken to work The little girl asks Daddy I saw you in your office with your secretary Why do you call her a doll? Feeling his wife Jeeto`s gaze upon him Santa explains Well honey my secretary is a very hard-working girl She types like you wouldn`t believe she knows the computer system and is very efficient Oh says the little girl I thought it was because she closed her eyes when you lay her down on the couch
Banta joined a big MNC as a trainee On his first day he dialed the pantry and shouted into the phone You Rascal Get me a coffee quickly The voice from the other side responded You fool you`ve dialed the wrong extension Do you know who you`re talking to dumbo? No replied the trainee It`s the Managing Director of the company you fool Banta shouted back And do you know who YOU are talking to you fool? No replied the Managing Director Good replied Banta put down the phone
One day Santa Banta and their friend walked into a bar together They proceeded to buy a drink Just as they where about to enjoy their drink three flies landed in each of their drinks Their friend pushed his beer away from him in disgust Banta fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened Santa picked the fly out of his drink held it out over the drink and then started yelling Spit it out Spit it out You Bastard Spit it out
In the midst of a hectic day at the office Santa got a phone call from his friend Banta Banta: Santa I just bought an expensive diamond ring for my wife Preeto I hope this won t break up our long friendship? Santa: Hey Banta Have you gone crazy? Why should your buying your wife an expensive diamond ring break up our friendship? After all you are not taking it to my wife Banta: But my wife is taking it to your wife; she s over to your house right now showing it to your wife
Santa went to a doctor to get some medicine as he was not feeling well This is pretty strong stuff said the doctor So take some first day then skip a day take some again and then skip another day and so on A few months after the doctor met Santa’s wife and asked how he was Oh he is in a coma she told him So the medicine I prescribed to him did him no good? asked the doctor Oh the medicine was all right she replied It was all that skipping that has almost killed him
Santa and Banta two sky divers having tired of all the ordinary stunts decided to set a world record by free falling to within 100 feet of the ground before opening their chutes Having jumped from 8000 feet the two came plummeting toward the earth When this altimeter read 100 Banta shouted to Santa Now? No not now Now? Banta screamed at 50 feet Not yet Come on Banta shrieked it s only ten feet For God s sake Banta Santa yelled haven t you ever fallen from ten feet before?
In Canada Santa earned enough money to buy himself a brand new car He drove out of the sales depot with an L-plate on the car As the car zig-zagged down the main highway a traffic cop picked him up Why are you going from one side of the road to the other? he demanded I am learning how to drive replied Santa You have to have a driving teacher beside you May I see your licence? Santa pulled out an envelope from his pocket and replied Here I am learning driving by correspondence
Judy called the police My next door neighbor is exposing himself Oh my she continued he s just standing there big as you please taking a shower with his window shades up The squad car arrived immediately to catch the evil culprit in the act She led the cop into her bedroom and pointed out her window See what I mean officer The policeman scratched his head and said Ma am I can only see the top of his head Judy Fool just put a chair on that dresser over there and stand on that
Santa and Banta meet in the street Santa looked dejected and almost on the verge of tears Banta said Hey how come you look like the whole world caved in? Santa said Let me tell you Three weeks ago an uncle died and left me fifty lacs That`s not bad Hold on I`m just getting started Two weeks ago a cousin I never knew died and left me twenty lacs I`d like that Last week my grandfather passed away I inherited almost a million The how come you look so glum? This week - nothing
Santa and Banta meet on the golf course and decide to finish off the round together Banta has a little dog with him and on the next green when Banta out with a 20 foot putt the little dog starts yipping and stands up on its hind legs Santa is quite amazed at this clever trick of the dog`s and says That dog is really talented What does it do if you miss a putt?? Banta: Somersaults Santa: Somersaults How many of them does it do? Banta: Mmm depends on how hard I kick it up the ass
Santa is speaking to his psychiatrist Santa: I`m on the road a lot and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me Psychiatrist: Don`t you have a phone in your car? Santa: That`s a little too expensive so I did the next best thing I put a mailbox in my car Psychiatrist: Uh How`s that working? Santa: Actually I haven`t gotten any letters yet Psychiatrist: And why do you think that is? Santa: I figured it`s because when I`m driving around my zip code keeps changing
Santa and Banta are employed in a computer hardware store as movers One day both of them are asked to move some computers Santa being energetic that day does not feel the computer to be heavy at all At the same time he sees that Banta is struggling very hard to lift his computer At this Santa says What Banta my computer has 500 MB Hard Disk yours has just 250 even then you cannot lift it? At this Banta thinks for a while and replies That is right but my HD is full and yours is empty
Santa had been out for a few days due to ill health At work Banta asked him how he was feeling? I m better thanks You know it was a wonderful experience he replied Wonderful? How can the cold and fever be wonderful? Banta asked Santa in stunned disbelief Well I learned that my wife Jeeto really loves me You know that whenever the mailman came by or a delivery man headed toward the door she ran out to meet them? I could hear her excitedly saying My husband is home My husband is home
Santa and Banta were hiking in the woods when Santa is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake I ll go into town for a doctor Banta says He runs 10 miles to a small town and finds the town s only doctor who is busy delivering a baby I can t leave the doctor says But here s what to do Take a knife cut a little x where the bite is suck out the poison and spit it on the ground Banta runs back to his friend who is in agony What did the doctor say? Santa asks He says you re gonna die
Santa was having trouble with his computer So he called the computer guy over to his desk He clicked a couple buttons and solved the problem As he was walking away Santa called after him So what was wrong? He replied It was an ID ten T error A puzzled expression ran over Santa`s face An ID ten T error? What`s that? in case I need to fix it again Haven`t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before? No replied Santa Write it down he said and I think you`ll figure it out He wrote I D 1 T
